You've done a lot of the hard work and potty training is now going well. To get things running smoothly you've been staying home and it's been working. You've got a good system happening between the two of you and there have been relatively few accidents in recent days. You're even starting to feel like this potty training thing is no big deal.
You wonder whether maybe it's time to head out, to move beyond the safety of home. However, you know that potty training at home is very different to potty training in the big wide world but you aren't sure how different and what to do to prepare yourself and educate your child on what to expect.
Just because it's new and perhaps a bit intimidating, you can't stay home forever. No really, you can't! Of course, it's tempting to put them in pull ups so you won't have to worry about any potential accidents. The only problem is that it isn't really sending your child the right message about the path ahead.
You know that your child can go for at least an hour in between potty visits so if you time it right you might be able to get there and back within the hour. Well, maybe. But bladders, especially children's bladders, aren't always like that. You know what it's like when you get excited or nervous, you need to go to the bathroom more. Your child is like that too, only they can't hold on like you can. So you may well find that your child needs to go more when they are out, not less.
So what can you do?
1. Explain to your child what will happen when you are out, how it will likely be different from home and any concerns you may have.
2. Get them to go, or at least try to go potty before you leave.
3. Find out where the toilets are as soon as you get wherever you are going and go straight away. It's much easier doing this calmly before they really need it than in the rush of a sudden urge.
4. If you're out in public, as you move around always be on the lookout for those tell-tale bathroom signs so you know exactly which direction you should head if you need to.
5. If you don't have a portable potty with you, try getting your child to sit backwards on a regular toilet some children find this easier because they have the wall or toilet cistern to hold onto and don't feel like they are going to fall off the seat on to the floor.
6. Take some spare clothing, a couple of plastic bags, and some baby wipes and paper towels with you in case of accidents.
7. If they have an accident in a shop or restaurant let the staff know and race to the bathroom with your child. Sure it is embarrassing but you wont be the first. All you can really do is apologize quickly and leave a big tip.
8. If your child has an accident at a friends house then it's your responsibility to clean it up. Best to take your own paper towels so you can quickly spring into action without having to ask for everything and make it a big deal.
9. Don't forget to take your sense of humour accidents or not, you're going to need it. There may be several false alarms with your child wanting to find out what happens when they say the magic trigger word. If you feel this is happening, try not to get upset with them. Instead try praising them for telling you and being so responsible about their potty training, even though you know it's not easy.
Good luck!
Some children don't like having bowel movements, perhaps because they have felt pain before, and now resist going. This resistance can cause constipation as the stool becomes hard and compacted, making bowel movements even more painful.
Here are some questions you can ask to determine whether your child is constipated or not.
** have they had a bowel movement in the past few days?
** have they had less than their normal amount of bowel movements this week?
** were their stools hard and dry?
** was it painful for them to pass?
** do they have stomach cramps or a distended stomach?
** are they complaining of being nauseous?
** are they losing weight?
** have they been vomiting for no apparent reason?
** are their underpants regularly soiled with clay-like or liquid stools?
If you have answered yes to several of the above then you'll know you need to take action and help your child. You can't make your child have a bowel movement so what can you do?
Get your child to drink more fluids, preferably water.
** If they are severely constipated and over nine months of age then some prune juice mixed with water should sort them out overnight.
** Make sure their diet is high in fibre try giving them some dried fruit or grapes and reduce the amount of dairy they have.
** Reduce their sugar intake
** Licorice can have a laxative effect and is a better option than medication which should only be given with your physicians approval.
** Make sure they are getting enough exercise it may be reflection of a sluggish metabolism.
** Encourage them to go as soon as they feel the need.
** If they just don't like it then talk about the importance of having regular bowel movements and how everyone does it.
** Encourage your child to sit on the potty for ten minutes an hour or so after each meal to see if you can encourage some regularity.
** Make sure your child can rest their feet on a stool or the floor so that they feel stable and balanced and can easily push.
** Try to make having a bowel movement more pleasant for your child by encouraging them to read a book or listen to music while they sit.
If the constipation doesn't go away then it is best to see your family doctor for advice as it may be indicative of something more serious.
It is very important that you don't make your baby feel self-conscious or fearful during potty training. It can be very difficult to potty train your baby so you have to be patient above all else.
Make sure your baby is ready for potty training. They need to be able to let you know when they need to potty and they need to be able, physically to use the facilities.
Use positive encouragement. Forcing them to sit on the potty until they go will only lead to setbacks in your baby's potty training. If you force them, it will create negative thoughts about using the bathroom that may last a long time.
You may even cause your baby to withhold letting you know they need to potty.
If there is a lot going on in your life, such as vacations, marriages, divorces, etc., then it may be a bad time to start your baby's potty training. Your routine should be as normal as possible while you take your baby through this process.
Don't let anyone tell you that your babys potty training should take any specific amount of time. Every child is unique and while some may learn in three days, others may take as long as a year. Don't stress on this point or force them to learn faster than they can. Take even small progress as a positive sign and show your baby how proud you are of them when they do well.
Accidents will happen. It's normal.
Don't make it out to be a big deal. Get them to help you clean up the mess and wait until next time to encourage them to use the potty. Overreacting to accidents will only lead to more accidents and again set back your babies progress.
Make sure you dress your baby in clothes that are easy to manage. They may wait until it's almost too late to make it to the potty, then because of the clothes fail. Again, that can discourage them and set back your babies progress. Nude is the ultimate way to let your baby run around while potty training. If you are uncomfortable with that, then make sure they have as few snaps, zipper, bows, or buttons to deal with. Clothing that just pulls up or down is the easiest type of clothing to dress your baby in while potty training.
For the little girls, make sure they wear two piece bathing suits for swimming so they won't have a harder time than little boys. Also, remember winter may not be the best time to potty train your baby. The need for extra clothing during winter will hamper your babies efforts to use the potty.
Bed-wetting, or enuresis is not solved through potty training and is a separate issue altogether. Don't expect that as you complete potty training that bed wetting will also stop at the same time. Many children don't stop wetting the bed until they are 4 years old. Babies under 3 don't have the bladder control to stop this yet. Children that are sleeping don't have the mental capacity to know they need to wake up, go to the bathroom, and use the toilet.
Keep your babies fears about potty training in mind. The loud flush of the toilet in a confined space might be frightening to your baby. If they slip and their bottom touches the water in the toilet, they can be traumatized to the point that you will have to stop potty training for awhile. Seeing something come out of them and then flushing down the toilet can even scare them. Remember their fears are real and their minds don't quite comprehend what is happening to them.
Another thing to consider is, your baby may not want to change certain things. They may feel secure in diapers. The fact that you have been changing their diaper and taking care of them may have them comfortable with that process and may make it difficult for them to begin taking care of themselves.
This loss of intimacy is frightful to your baby. Your child may not become independent so easily. This is also normal. Make sure in the beginning that you spend time with them to be close and intimate with them after potty time so they don't miss the time you spent with them when they were wearing diapers and you took care of them.
A new mom will quickly learn when baby is telling her that he is tired or hungry. Baby will also tell you when he is about to soil his diaper - or 'eliminate' in the jargon. The signs are usually a grunting and moving into a certain position. My son used to get this far away look on his face and he would be very noisy so that everyone around him knew what was on the way!
Many moms in America are now practicing 'elimination communication' whereby they watch baby for signs that he is ready to 'eliminate' and then dangle him over the toilet or a potty.
The technique does require virtually constant observation of the baby but apparently baby soon learns the procedure and knows that if he grunts hard enough it saves him having to sit around with a diaper full of you-know-what!
The savings achieved through having to buy far fewer diapers are considerable, and of course you would be doing your bit to help the environment.
Potty training at the 'traditional' age of around 2-3 can be a real battle and a scary time for a kid. My daughter stubbornly refused to use either a potty or the toilet for weeks and finally succumbed only when we bribed her with the promise of a new dolly!
Starting much earlier would spare you both but the technique does require constant attention and, for this reason, some experts 'pooh-pooh' the idea (sorry!) of starting potty training so early. Heather Welford of the National Childbirth Trust believes most parents will be too busy to watch baby all day and says 'I think it will always be something practiced by a minority of parents doing it for ideological reasons such as being closer to the baby or to help save the environment'. Two good reasons I would have thought.
Potty training your child could be a big challenge, especially if it is your firstborn. You may be a little nervous wondering if you are doing everything correctly to ensure the process goes as smoothly as possible. Potty training is a natural part of a child's development and can be made easier just by understanding factors that indicate your child is ready to begin learning the task.
One important thing to stay away from is thinking that potty training has to take place at a specific age. Children develop different skills at different ages and every child is unique. Therefore you can not expect your child to lean how to potty train at the same age your best friend's child learned.
Instead be patient and understanding.
Trying to potty train a child before they are ready could results in many setbacks. If the child does not understand what is happening and why you are taking them into the bathroom they may become discouraged and even afraid of the bathroom. This could add to the length of time it takes your child to learn how to use the potty. Therefore, you need to wait until your child is old enough to understand just what using the potty means.
This would include things like knowing when your child is beginning to have better control over their bladder because they or staying dry more often. Also, when they show signs that they do not like having their pants wet or soiled then you can feel sure they are beginning to understand and its time to start potty training. They should also be coordinated enough to be able to pull their pants up and down.
After all, if they cannot perform this task it would be difficult to use the potty and may begin to discourage them. You can help in this area by providing clothing that is easier for the child to remove.
Children are very curious and love to watch what you do, by allowing them to observe you in the bathroom they will begin to understand and want to imitate this action. Have a potty chair ready for your child and explain to them what it is and how to use it. Keeping a light on in the bathroom can also help considering most light switches are too high for a child to reach. If they are spending too much time trying to get the light on then it may be too late to use the potty. One of the most important steps in potty training your child would be to never yell at them for accidents and always let them know you are proud of them.
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